Pinterest is ruining America, and by America I mean Thanksgiving

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Yesterday, while I was debating whether to kill myself or finish the accounting homework, Pinterest sent me an email. This itself is not unusual. Despite the fact that I haven’t been active on Pinterest in months (even to update my Hot Dead Guys board,) Pinterest is hoping I come back often for the click$, so they send me emails when someone repins my pins,when someone starts following me, and sometimes, just to be nice.

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Well, that’s the last time I’m going to be tricked by a salad bowl

As you may be aware, I like to buy shit online.Especially for the house.

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There is nothing more exciting than buying shit online, except buying shit online that you’re psychologically motivated into buying by the combination of never-ending innovation of American consumerist practices and Pinterest.

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Pinteresting


I want to bake one-minute bread in the comfort of my own home.  I want to simmer foolproof minestrone. I want to make an advent calendar out of baby socks.  I want to incorporate exotic fruit into latkes.  I want to keep calm and carry on. I want to find the right ponytail for boudoir photography. I want to arrange all of my M.A.C. brand Winter 2012 Edition makeup in a symmetrical container. I need to look sweaty while I am not sweating in head-to-toe Lululemon.  I want to take a picture of only my leopard-print ballet flats looking out shyly from  in the corner of the frame. #nofilter Continue reading