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Things I hate about Europe

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We are currently on vacation in The UK (or in queue, as they say here) and will be back soon. I am sure you will be subject to at least two weeks of blog posts about it, but in the meantime, a list!

-European bathrooms
-European socialism
-the fact that everyone has normal chip-based credit cards here and I look like a moron with my American dinosaur
-the metric system
-24 hour time
-Celsius
-the fact that Monday is the first day of the week here
- day day/ month month/year year year year
( the last four are the reason for the American revolution by the way)
-castles are even colder than my parents house
-Asian tourists. Everywhere. Taking pictures in every possible combination. Taking pictures in Sacred Churches, on top of coffins, in reliquaries, with relics, with famous dead white men. With the FLASH on. I am only slightly exaggerating.
-I can never go to the bathroom here because It is ridiculous asking where the “toilet” is. If the bathroom is the toilet, then what is the actual toilet here????
-After a week of various British accents, I am ashamed of my ugly American accent and have resorted to sign language in cafes.
- when you are done eating, they don’t bring the check ( or chequeueue) right away, but wait until you are as anxious as you can possibly be, then ask you with surprise if you want the bill
- Dominique Strauss-Khan

7 Comments Join the Conversation

  1. Aw, I actually like that they don’t bring the check until you ask for it.  I always feel servers here in the US want to kick us out as soon as possible.

    And the metric system rocks, you weirdo!  *wink*  No, but really, it does.  

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  2. Aw, I hope you’re finding things to enjoy about your holiday anyway.
    Although your list made me laugh because it contains most of the things I love about living in Europe. I’ve even become ambivalent to the picture-happy Asians after an incident in Scotland in which we were accosted by a number of Korean schoolgirls and asked to pose for pictures with them “for a project”. They were ever so sweet and enthusiastic about it. Totally endearing.
    Although if you consider the UK socialist now, under the right-wing government we currently have, I cannot fathom what you would have thought of it when it was Prime Ministered by people whose M.O. was not finding ever new ways to fuck with the poor and the disabled and the female.
    You can just ask for the bill though, when you want to go. That’s what I do normally.

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  3. What are you on about? The metric system rules, and I can’t do anything using Fahrenheit.
    On the other hand, you’re not exaggerating about the Asian tourists.
    Also, day-month-year makes way more sense than month-day-year. It’s plain order, see?
     
    p.s. did you have that afternoon tea for me?

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  4. Excuse me, but Monday is the first day of the week per the Holy Bible.  Obviously you need to spend some time reading it. In the cafe, perhaps.

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  5. I’m picturing you hopping back and forth next to your table, waiting for the cheque, scowling at the servers and unwilling to ask for the toilet as or the time. Also, you’re wearing two fur coats next to everyone else’s sweaters, having looked at the local forecast for the day… ;)

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