In Philadelphia traffic, everyone’s an engineer*


Welcome to Hell! We have cheesesteak!

My commute has changed (perhaps you’ve heard?!) from 25 minutes walking-to Metro-to walking to work, to 1 hour 20 minutes grinding it out on I-95 South on what should be a 35-minute commute.  Most of the time, cars going the opposite direction can see this:

Insert your own caption here

As a result, I have become a very astute civil engineer.  For some reason, there are specific areas on I-95 South that clog up, the dreaded Cottman to Girard corridor.   As I pass, I think, “What the hell were they thinking with only two lanes here?  It should be widened to three to allow for a more efficient merge.”  Or, “Why is there a disabled vehicle STILL here?  It’s holding up traffic, why don’t the police see this thing?”  Or, “If we had alternate driving days and city tolls like in Singapore or London, oh my life would be amazing.”

Every pothole is scrutinized, every intersection is scanned for more efficiencies in my driving patterns until Mr. B moves here and we can buy a house in my cubicle so the only traffic I’ll face is a jam at the water cooler.

This week, however.  This week, is THANKSGIVING. Which means all the other morons on the road (not me, of course. I am a perfect driver whose presence does not create any traffic.) are going to Richmond and New York and flying out of the airport, and today my commute took an amazing 47 minutes, saving me at least 25 minutes of commuting time.

25 minutes!  That’s 15 GRE questions I could solve.   Enough time to start a conversation about Nicki Minaj on Skype with Mr. B.  A sunrise.  Part of my soul deadened by traffic coming back.

So this week, I’m floating on clouds as traffic becomes lighter and lighter.

Next week, I’m putting on my PhD CEE hat on again, charging my iPod, and scoping out cubicles to move into.

*Kind of like there are no atheists in foxholes