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Healthcare and the best of the summer

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I need to schedule a physical because I’m pretty sure I have restless overreactive brain syndrome which will result in my untimely death and Mr. B becoming a young widower who finally gets some peace and quiet and doesn’t have to answer my annoying questions.  This is in spite of the fact that I am now virtually bulletproof.    But,  I’ve been having some trouble scheduling my physical.

There are several issues at hand here.  First,  there is no free market for medicine in America (or in most places) and I am forced to  choose between whatever is available from my company-sponsored healthcare plan.So I am already segmented into a specific group of doctors and can’t choose who I want.

The other problem is that healthcare knowledge is generally not public knowledge, at least to my knowledge,  so there is no rating system a-la Yelp for doctors other than word-of-mouth from those in the same healthcare plan as you. (Although there have been some attempts.)

So I end up having to root around on my insurance company’s website for a list of doctors near my office and I get a list of physicians that includes their name, address, medical school, and specialty, which is not much to go by at all.

The process ends up going something like this,

So, for now, I am stuck.  If I could, I would really stay away from Soviet-educated doctors. But other than that, I have no information upon which to base my decision.  This is extremely frustrating on several levels, one of which is that I can’t go to my old pediatrician anymore since he retired and therefore cannot receive a Tootsie Pop when I’m done with my visit.

Eventually, I’ll suck it up and pick one at random.

It’s not as big of a problem as this post makes it out to be.  But I really just wanted an excuse to post that last tweet one more time, because it’s the best thing I’ve written all summer.

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  1. It is a very witty tweet. Also, you wouldn’t want to leave Mr. B a young widower. Are you insane? He’ll be snapped up by some monster of another woman in a flash!

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    • Other women have eyed him because they fall for his facade of nice Jewish boy much as I did. It is only much later you find out that this man still wears shirts purchased in 1995.

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      • 1995-vintage shirts? We call them “new” in my closet. My wife mutters about the “icons” I wear that date back to 1968. Sadly, I date back much further. (Excellent post, btw.)

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  2. There are sites out there where you can rate doctors. I went off of it when I had to find a specialty doctor. I forget the specific site, but I’m sure your search engine of choice can guide you in the right direction. Good luck!

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    • I’ll Google it eventually, when I become so disease-stricken that leprosy shakes me out of my stupor.

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  3. Talk to coworkers, and see if you can find pics or Google them… I only use female doctors, and I usually try to choose the one who looks the least likely to judge me. But I’m neurotic. :)

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    • At first I thought you wrote that you only choose doctors that look like you. Which is starting to sound like an awesome strategy.

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    • Too small of a sample size, plus, no clue what insurance they’re covered by. There needs to be a review directory of doctors with their respective plans. Maybe there is but I just don’t know about it.

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